Archive | October 2011

Love Her

“Under three things the earth trembles, under four it cannot bear up… an unloved woman who is married.” Proverbs 30:21, 23a

What does a woman long for from her husband? Simply love. A husband’s love is like a fresh breath from heaven for a wife who feels vulnerable and at times fearful. His love is a rock of refuge after she reels from a relational conflict at work, church, or from another family member. The love of her husband goes a long way in satisfying that deep desire of a woman to love and be loved. 

“His banner over me is love” (Song of Solomon 2:4b).

Husbands, a gracious woman is not to be taken advantage of or to be taken for granted. Instead, thank God for a wife who wants to please the Lord and serve her family. When was the last time you loved your bride in a way that she wants you to love her, in a way that only you can love her? Have you asked her lately how she needs to feel loved by you?

Outside of Christ’s love, your love is the most meaningful, valuable, and satisfying to your spouse. She needs to know that all of you belongs to her and all of her belongs to you. There is never a place for a feeling of competition between your wife and another woman. Dismiss this danger at the outset. Make your wife feel the fidelity of a “one-woman man.” You desire no other.

“My lover is mine and I am his” (Song of Solomon 2:16a).

Where can you learn to love your wife? Ask her. Learn from her, for this is her natural disposition. Seek out men who love their wives well and gain insights from them. Ask God. He is the Lord of love and Lord over your marriage. Go to the source of love, your Savior Jesus, and He will instruct you in the way you can love your wife unconditionally.

By God’s grace, love her by protecting her. Love her by trusting her. Love her by giving her encouragement and hope. And always love her through the good times and the bad times. Love her with your words, love her with your time and love her with gifts and kind words. A wife loved well by her husband is beautiful to behold—she is a trophy of God’s grace.

“It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres” (1 Corinthians 13:7).

How does my wife want me to love her? How does God want me to love my wife?

Related Readings: Ecclesiastes 9:9; Hosea 3:1; 1 Corinthians 13; Ephesians 5:25-26

Respect Him

“The wife must respect her husband.” Ephesians 5:33b
Respect for a husband is like love is for a wife. It is a catalyst for his confidence and encouragement that he can fulfill his role as provider and leader. Most men question their ability to be everything they need to be for their family. But insecurities become insignificant in a home where a husband feels respect. A wife’s support energizes her man like jet fuel to a booster rocket.

Husbands need the respect and support of their wives. It of course works both ways, as the wife needs to feel the support of her husband. But, respect is huge for a man. A God-fearing husband knows the Lord has placed him in a position of leadership. It is overwhelming sometimes, feeling squeezed by the pressures of life. The last thing a husband needs to feel is distance or distrust from his wife. Her spousal support may be the only thing that is preventing him from giving up.

“He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a manner worthy of full respect” (1 Timothy 3:4).

Wives: Do not underestimate how your support sustains your husband. Your affirmation is valuable and powerful for the ongoing success of your husband. Men are not as self-sufficient as they might seem. On the outside we may seem invincible, but on the inside we are needy and desperate for recognition and validation. A man needs to know his wife trusts his decision making and his ability to provide for his family.

Your confidence in him propels his confidence in himself to higher levels. Your belief in your husband builds him up to believe in himself. It is difficult for a man to rise any higher than the opinion of his helpmate. Men long to be built up by their brides. Brag on him in public and affirm him in private. Look to your husband as the leader God has placed in your life.

Pray for him to lead lovingly and wisely. Be patient and don’t usurp his authority when things are not getting done. Trust him to God, for He can handle him much better than your creative consequences. Give him over to God and trust in the accountability of the Almighty. Embrace your husband in the light of eternity. God wants him to grow up and give spiritual leadership. Let him lead—even when it means he fails. Your respect can grow the heart of your husband to love well.

“Give to everyone what you owe them: If you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor” (Romans 13:7).

How can I respect my husband in a way that encourages him and also honors the Lord?

Related Readings: Deuteronomy 1:15; Proverbs 31:23; Luke 11:43; 1 Timothy 3:2-4

Let Your Feelings Show

Dr. Robin Smith

When you are feeling sad, do you allow yourself to cry and let your loved ones know that you are upset? What about when you are scared or stressed? Dr. Robin says the idea that powerful and respected people hide their feelings of sadness, grief or embarrassment is very popular in our society. “We don’t often hear people in power talk about their vulnerabilities, their places that are rough,” she says. “[Instead], we love the feelings of strength and power, we love to feel that we are in control, we love to feel that we have the answer.”

To really be a powerful person, Dr. Robin says you must have access to all your feelings. Dr. Robin says that your feelings—both good and bad—need to be acknowledged by you and by others.

“Embrace, manage and figure out how to be fully human,” Dr. Robin says. “Take every feeling that you have and every experience—those that have left you feeling really intact and those that really threw you off your course—and use all of it to live your very best life.”

A Liberated Soul

I read this today and I felt a need to share because it shows that no matter your struggle, if deep within you have a desire to follow His Will and be an example to others of His wonder He can heal all your ills.

Luke links Mary with Joanna and Susanna and “many others” as those healed of evil spirits and infirmities by Jesus. As Mary is referred to as having “seven demons” her condition must have been worse than the rest. But the moment Jesus’ compassionate eyes saw the wild-eyed and cringing woman of Magdala, He saw in her the ministering angel who would be a blessing to His own heart and to others. In His authoritative voice He commanded the tormenting demons to come out—and stay out—of her. “Back! back! to your native hell, ye foul spirits of the pit,” and the miracle happened. Her deranged and nerve-racked mind became as tranquil as the troubled lake Jesus calmed. Sanity returned, the rosy tint was restored to her cheeks, and she was made whole. Now, “clothed and in her right mind,” she was ready to become one of the most devoted woman disciples of Him to whom she owed so much. That she was deeply grateful for physical and mental healing is shown by what she endeavored to do for her Deliverer and His cause. Saved from the terrible power of hell, she gave of her best to Him who had fully emancipated her from demonic possession. When Christ saved her, He liberated the highest virtues of sacrifice, fortitude and courage.

Scripture Meditation ~ Love Is The Greatest

Love is the Greatest
1 If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. 3 If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing. ~ 1 Cor 13:1-3 (NLT)
Remember that the quality of your relationship with God is not determined by what you say, but by how you LOVE. If genuine love for God and others is there, the actions will follow as a natural consequence of that love. Thank God for His limitless, absolute, and unconditional love for you.